Monday, 13 April 2015

Playlist Freedom

You know how a song can take you back to a certain point in time, or give you these feelings you thought were buried beneath the surface or gone altogether? I rarely put my music on shuffle, I'm the type of person that likes order, I like to know what is coming next. Not just with my music, with everything. Today I put my music on shuffle, forcing me to listen to a song at the bottom of my list, had I not been on shuffle I most likely wouldn't have made it that far down my playlist before turning it off. A song came on "Neon Love" by Karmin, this song isn't particularly significant to me but it took me back to when I listened to it in the summer time. Specifically when I would go on my nightly walks. I miss those walks, in the dark just me and my music, walking at my own pace following where my feet would take me (which would obviously be one of 2 paths I would always take because.. well I like to know whats coming... but that is neither here nor there).

The song came on and immediately a smile spread across my face and warmth through my heart. I thanked God for good weather then opened up this page to start typing.

It made me think about what is in store for me for this summer. It's going to be a lot different for me, going through a separation and everything. I remember 2 summers ago I was sitting on top of the fence outside of my place wrapped in a yellow blanket, at first I was listening to music but then I took my ear buds out and just sat there. I wanted to cry but I couldn't, my mind was so defeated that all I could do was sit there. I started praying and had asked God to change my life, I needed something different, I couldn't keep going as I was going. I remember the song I was listening to just before I had stopped my music and now when I hear that song it takes me back to that moment in time, one of my lowest points in my marriage and now I am able to reflect. Am I happy now being separated? In some ways yes, in some ways no. Did I do it just so that I could be single? Absolutely not. I'm lonely, but I was even more lonely while in my marriage. This isn't a hate post or a blaming game, I have my own faults too just to clear that up. When I listen to that song does it make me happy? I'd say it brings me peace. I know I made the right decision getting a separation, I've learned so much about myself and what I want for myself. I've learned how to value myself and make choices more carefully. What I did want out of all of this was a closer relationship with God and I have to say I have really dropped the ball on that one. No one to blame but myself I suppose.

I love this time of year though, where spring is just around the corner and music is nostalgic! The air is filled with hope and the skies with wonder. I hope this summer is a great one. I hope it is filled with adventure and experience. I hope it's filled with memories attached to music so that I can relive it next year when I put my playlist on shuffle. I also hope it involves me having a bangin' body because I've been at the gym for a while now lol ;) Time to crack down on that diet! But that is for a different post lol. Back to the music- I love how when listening to older music on your playlist, mixed with the changing weather, can make you feel so excited. I love the spring time! Spring always makes me feel so giddy for what's to come. I'm always wiggling in my seat uncontrollably ready for what this world has to throw at me. Spring gives me courage, it gives me life! Most of all spring gives me freedom. Or rather the feeling of courage to help me feel freedom... if that makes sense. The last few spring's I have felt stuck, I yearned for that feeling of freedom but my own self stood in the way of that. But this year... this year I am free. My heart is light and my smile huge. I am so ready for whatever is to be thrown my way. I'm ecstatic!!!

And here is a random photo of my cat Bosco. Enjoy.

Thursday, 20 November 2014

These Are A Few Of My Favorite Things

Before I fell asleep last night I was thinking to myself about what I could write about for my next blog post.  I didn't come up with anything but at about 1am I woke up and the idea popped into my head about writing down my favorite things as of late. So I’m going to listen to my inner slumber and write about it. I actually have no idea what I’m even going to say so we’ll both be surprised I guess!
                                                            Dark roast coffee    


                                                                            Candy crush

You can call me the Candy Crush Queen if you'd like
I wouldn't object ;) 
But seriously though, how addicting is this game?!? 

Day dreaming of trips
Seems I can never get enough of getting away. 

Healthy soy hairspray
Because seriously, how can you not love something
that keeps your hair in place on windy days
like we've been having lately?

The walking dead

Okay seriously, my love for this show is unreal! I could watch it on repeat that's how obsessed I am. It's suspenseful, well plotted, main characters die (well not 'the' main character...not yet anyway). It's gory but not too gory. I welcome the nightmares it brings. However if Darryl Dixon dies I might not welcome the nightmares. I hope there is many more seasons to come! This show deserves a whole post to itself on my blog!

Working Out
I recently re-joined the gym and I couldn't be happier about that choice. I spent the summer going for walks and doing at-home workouts here and there (more like less here and less there) but I hadn't been to an actual gym in a year. Honestly I was a bit afraid, the last time I was there I never saw any results and just got totally frustrated. I blame it on lack of motivation but mostly lack of knowledge. I didn't know what I was doing or what to do to get certain results I wanted. Since then I started following more fitness pages on Instagram, and not just fitspo crap but real every day people posting about their workouts and such. That in itself is a huge motivation for me and I love when I can get new exercise ideas and eating ideas too. Last year I didn't change my eating at all and I guess I just didn't want to believe that you cant out work a bad diet. Also, a lot of my friends have joined the gym and even though I mostly go by myself it's nice to be able to talk about it with people who share an interest. I can also be a bit competitive which will totally help for weight loss lol. I've been there for a total of 4 weeks, last week I wasn't there at all, life kind of just got in the way but I found myself sad about it. Also, yesterday I went to a yoga class and I found myself sad that I didn't get to go to the gym. It's kind of cool to feel that way, I hardly ever dread going and usually look forward to it! Also, yoga is hard! Not to mention my hands get super sweaty immediately so I can't hold a pose for longer then it takes my hands to slip right off the mat :I 
I spend a little too much time on Vine, and my phone battery
can prove that :s but it is so addicting. There is so much
talent on this app its ridiculous. My vines are no where near greatness but I enjoy making them and getting better. Some of my favorite viners are:
-Jesse Pomerico    -Kayleigh Isabella   -Chrish
-Zachary Piona     -Kayla Ann              -Caleb Hurst
-Steph Barkley       -Jacob Kornwolf     -Tony Tomahawk
-Pastatute              -Hannah Pilkes       -JacklynK
-Manon Mathews  -Tom Vrab              -Chris delia
I could seriously go on and on but these are probably my top picks.


Music in my playlist I've been diggin' lately:
Mr. Probz- Waves
David Guetta- Dangerous
Lights- Speeding
Calvin Harris- Blame
Taylor Swift- Wildest Dreams

Command Start/Heated Seats

Now that winter is here I'm so beyond relieved that I actually have command start, and I would also be excited about heated seats except for that mine is broken. So if anyone wants to drive me around so I can sit in the passenger seat (cuz that one still works) I wouldn't be opposed to it ;)

 Makeup/Or lack of

You might be reading that "lack of" part and think that maybe that's a typo but I can assure you, it was indeed intentional. Since the beginning of summer I stopped wearing foundation (and in turn had to stop wearing blush and bronzer), I got a tan and just enjoyed my skin instead. Letting my face breathe has been so nice plus it's been nice to be able to touch my face and not worry about my makeup coming off. Not to mention the amount of time I've been able to shave off of my getting ready in the morning... okay I worded that wrong... it's allowed me to spend less time on my face and more time on my hair. I wear my hair curly a lot now and I love it!! I just haven't had the urge to put that much makeup on, I put a tiny bit of eyeshadow around the outer corners of my eyes, mascara and do my eyebrows and voila, done! I've even worn my makeup the exact same for all of the summer and haven't once felt like I'm in a makeup slump. It's been liberating really. 

Hot Chocolate

And not just any hot chocolate, I'm talking candy cane hot chocolate from Tim Hortons. 


I have a running list in my notes section in my phone devoted to Lush. If you don't know what Lush is, it's a cute little store that sells bath related things. You can get bath bombs, bubble bars, lotions, deodorants, all kinds of things and it's all natural and hand made. Freaken love that store! Check out their site if you haven't already or if your local you can find them in Winnipeg at Polo Park or St. Vital. 

1.Imperialis Facial Moisturizer
2.Cerdiwen Cauldron Bath Melt
3.Grease Lightening Facial Serum
4.Ambrosia Shave Cream 
(just a few things that are at the top of my 'to get' list)

Let's face it, I could go on and on about my favorite things but I'll leave it at that. Talking about these things kind of reminds me of what a friend of mine said yesterday. She said she wanted to take the time to appreciate the little things. When she said that, it reminded me of a few days ago when I had texted a friend saying my day was going so good cuz candy cane hot chocolate was back. He was surprised that that would make my day and I replied with "what's life if you can't get excited about the little things?!" I'd much rather live my life being happy because of a cup of hot chocolate or my boss throwing coffee into the wind and it splashing all over his brand new truck (true story). If we wait for those big, grand moments to make or break our day ... well most days wouldn't be spent super happy then. So do yourself a favor and stop to soak in the moments. The small moments. Enjoy them and let yourself smile. 

Wednesday, 19 November 2014

This Took A Turn

I've been searching for a new place to live recently and places around where I live are pretty slim in my price range. I contemplated buying my own house but I really don't want to have to clear the driveway. Good reason, I know. But I'd rather buy a house in spring or summer I think so I'll just continue to rent for now. In fact today I will be looking at a basement suite. I know, I know, a basement suite? But it's so dark and dingy and depressing! Well the ad said it has big windows so I'm really putting a lot of weight on that. It's a 2 bedroom, so for now I will live there by myself (if I like the place and if I get it) and if the second bedroom is decently sized and I get a bit lonely after a while then I will consider exploring the roommate options. I'm getting really sick of moving though I tell ya! Like the actually moving part I hate, loading and unloading boxes, but re-organizing in a new space is what makes it all worth it! So obviously I have been dreaming up ways I can organize and decorate "my" place. Hard to do when you don't know how your future place is going to look but it's fun to think about. Theres two big ticket items I need to get, one is a table/chairs and the other is a couch. The table and chairs part of it I was thinking I might just get a move-able island and use that as a table and just get some bar stools. Then I can use it for a table or for cooking/prepping space. I really like this one (pictured below) from Ikea but I think I'm going to ask my mom to help me build one exactly the same. Unless it would cost me more then $250 which is what this one costs then I might as well just buy it.

I love the raw industrial feel of it. Normally I look the other way when it comes to lighter shades of wood but this just seems to work so well. I'd probably pair it with an industrial type bar stool too. Maybe something along these lines:

Admittedly these are  a little out of my price range but I'd be on the lookout for a deal. I just seem to like these styles. I found both of these on the Walmart website. Now that I see the the stools next to the island photo though I'm not so sure... maybe some wood top ones with metal feet like this:

(found off of Pinterest, I don't know where you can get them)

Maybe if I did go with the island route for a makeshift table then I'd have room for a coffee cart/bar cart. That is like my dream to have one of those lol. I don't want to get too ahead of myself though, it all depends on the amount of space I will be allotted.

         *Okay, so I wrote this post a week ago and after I went and looked at that basement suite I decided not to get it and to stay living where I am for the winter*

That little disclaimer being said, that portable island would have totally worked in that basement space. The space itself wasn't ideal for me and I'm actually glad I didn't take it, a few things have lined up pretty nicely since then and it's good that I stayed where I am.

So instead I'm going to turn this into a different type of post! It's going to be a post about my bedroom I'm staying in now. I'd like to decorate and re-organize it into a more enjoyable space for myself. I spend a lot of time in it so I want to be happy when I walk into the room. I'm going on a shopping trip to get a few things this weekend so I think I might take pictures of it all when I'm done. I need to set up my bed frame this weekend I think (right now my bed is just on the floor), I've held off on that because I know it's going to make the space a lot smaller and its small enough as it is. Because of this I decided to get rid of my tall standing dresser and opt for low/wide drawers from Ikea to put onto my closet floor. I've bought part of it already but the top and bottom were out of stock (it will make sense when I actually post finished pictures) so it isn't complete (yet!).

This is the drawer set from Ikea, I'm missing the top board 
and the bottom boards for the drawers to sit on top of.

I'm still arranging what I want inside them but it has become quite clear that everything that was in my tall dresser will most definitely not all fit in here. So I was thinking of adding some wire baskets on top of this shelf to put stuff into.

Something like this (found at Target)

I've also decided it's time for a new blanket. Currently I have a brown zebra print comforter, purple pillow cases and a grey sheet. I was browsing Targets selection of comforters and was drawn to the one pictured below but I wasn't sure if a grey blanket and grey sheets would be grey overload. But I think it will pair quite nicely with my purple pillow cases (I also have purple sheets so that works too). Speaking of which I need a new pillow....

I do really like the purple but I think it would
be too much of one color. 

Along with that I'd like to pick up a new night stand. The one I currently have is big and bulky (and brown) and I'm just not diggin it. I saw this one at Target last weekend and I totally should have gotten it but I didn't. 

I love the femininity of it and that's sort of what I'm going for in my room. I hope after I've gotten everything that I want that my room will look put together lol. I tend to like a lot of things but once put together it doesn't always flow seamlessly. Now that I've determined my color palette is grey and purple that will be easy to stick to. 

I also need better lighting in there and I've been really liking those industrial feel lamps lately (expensive though!). I just don't know if I'll have the space for it but we shall see. 

I would place one on each side of my makeup stand for better lighting when I do my makeup (since it's now winter and dark when I wake up.... *dies a little inside* ). I really like the third one because it mixes silver and gold and I'm just really drawn to that. 

Some other cute things I'll be on the lookout for:

I currently have a flat tray for my perfumes but I love
the look of the cake tray. I'm just not sure how 
functional that will be since my collection
is always growing :s 

I neeeeeeed this!!! Like right now. 
I just don't know where to get it...
so I will be researching that after
I post this lol. 

I've really been wanting one of these for 
my rings but I haven't been able to find one
that I really love. I currently have them in a
white glass bowl and it's just so boring.

That's mainly everything for the bigger items of my room that I'd like to get. Other then that I'm going to focus on the decor of it all but I'm sorta dreading that part. I need to get some inspiration. I guess it's off to Pinterest for me darlings!

Hope everyone is having a great week so far :)  

Thursday, 6 November 2014

Hey Sugar!

Lets talk about wax baybeeee, lets talk about you and me! Ok I'm done. That's a spin on a song by the way in case you didn't catch that! I little while ago I had told my sister in law that I wanted to make a post but didn't know what to write about. Then she gave me the idea of writing about my waxing experience (guys, you can tune out at this point). Obviously I didn't make this post right when she had given me the idea but I knew I still wanted to write about it. It wasn't a traumatizing experience or anything special but after I had done it I was like why on earth have I waited so long to do this?!?!? And I have not gone back to shaving since!

First let's talk about the two different types of waxing (in my area anyway, not sure if there is numerous different kinds out there). There's Honey waxing and Sugar waxing.

Honey Waxing

Basically this is a heated up wax that is applied directly to the skin with a wooden spatula and a woven strip placed on top of the wax. The wax latches onto your hair and from pulling on the woven strip it pulls out the hair from the root. Because each hair is pulled out from the root this is what takes the hair more time to grow back. So you're left with a silky smooth surface for a few weeks! Benefits to waxing are that each time you go in and get waxed, your hair will grow back slower and more sparse. This doesn't necessarily mean you will go in one month and then two months and then three months apart, there will still always be hair growing back it will just be more patchy and less thick. Also your hair will be finer and a lot softer. Also honey waxing is a lot faster then sugar waxing however you can't go over the same patch of hair twice so whatever hair doesn't get pulled out right away has to be tweezed off (you will already be slightly numb from the wax strip anyway so tweezing doesn't hurt at all). Also, and this is minor, you might be left kind of sticky afterward which is just a bit uncomfortable but this can be removed with any type of oil.

Sugar Waxing

First of all I will say that sugar waxing in a salon and sugar waxing kits from the store are completely different. The kits from the store work exactly the same as honey waxing but the cleanup is a lot easier (can be taken off with water instead of oil). I have tried this myself and I did like the method and it was a lot less messy however store kits do not compare to salon waxing (in my opinion). In the salon the sugar wax is almost like a sticky putty like consistency. This is not done with woven strips. They take a small amount of the wax in their hands and place it directly onto a small area, smoothing it down with their fingers then grabbing the wax with their fingers and pulling it off. They continue to use the same blob of wax until it no longer pulls any hair out. That blob gets thrown out (along with the glove they (should) have on) and grab a new blob to continue on.

Now lets talk about the benefits to waxing versus shaving. Shaving is kind of a quick easy thing but it needs to be done every day, waxing will keep your skin baby smooth for at least a good 2 weeks before it starts growing back. Do you have any idea how much that cuts down my shower time?! I myself have gotten my bikini area and under arms done. Eventually I might do my legs but for now I'll keep my costs down by continuing to shave those. If you have really think coarse hair it immediately makes it softer and more sparse (definitely love that). Also if you have an ingrown hair problem (like I do) this really helps minimize that. The only downfall to waxing is that you have to let the hair grow for a good 2 weeks (from when it actually starts to reach the surface of your skin) before you can get it waxed again and that is quite the time to have hair growing where you don't want it growing. Plus if you are getting your under arms done then that really sucks in summer because who wants to be caught with their arms up when they've got a jungle goin' on under there?!

There's also a lot of at home recipes for sugar waxing, this could be worth 
trying out if you're wanting to save a few dollahs $$
 I personally have not tried any so I can't weigh in on that.

Another thing worth mentioning is comparing store bought waxes to going to the salon. For me personally, I like the idea of going to a salon and treating myself to something beauty related. It makes me feel all feminine and good about myself. But another thing is that you just lay back and let them do their job. If you are doing a wax kit at home you have to either pull those strips yourself (if you have the guts) or get your husband to do it (sexy)... well you could always get your roommate or sister to do it but saying husband just seemed to prove my point better. Also they just don't seem to do the job as well. I've tried waxing my own legs a few times, using different waxes and I just never seem to get all the hair. It's never baby smooth and if I'm going to be going through the pain of waxing then my skin sure as hell better be smoother then a babies bum. I've also tried the at home sugar waxing kit on my bikini area and not one hair came off. You read that right, NOT ONE HAIR!!!! I was beyond frustrated. That is actually the moment I decided to go to a salon in the first place. Too bad I hadn't tried waxing that area myself years ago!

I'll talk about my experience in a minute but I just wanted to expand on why I said I would never go back to shaving. It's soooooo easy! You go in, you lay down, they get to work, you drop some cash monies, you walk out a hairless beauty! As if that isn't enough, you shower the next day and look down and you just want to keep petting your own skin because its so damn smooth (it's not weird to do that I promise). On top of that your shower time is shortened, and personally for me I'm less embarrassed about my underarms. I have an ingrown hair problem on my bikini area and also my underarms. So much so that I will refuse to lift my arms if I'm not wearing a sweater. It's not super gross or anything but they aren't smooth and clear and with the ingrowns comes a  little bit of a darker coloration. I've gotten them done twice now but I just continued to tweeze them after my second time because I joined the gym and lift my arms a lot. I don't really have a time where I can let them grow out... now that I think about it though I guess I could always wear a sweater. If you are going to do this though you need to be careful, tweezing can lead to ingrowns as well if you don't pull the hair out from the root.If you pull and the hair snaps it can start to grow in circles under the skin and that is what an in grown hair is. The same reason is why I wont go back to shaving my bikini area. The skin there is so sensitive and prone to in growns as well so it's just all around a better deal for me if I keep waxing.

Oh and another thing worth mentioning is price. I think price will vary between salons but for the most part I think they keep it pretty competitive. I think for a brazilian it was around $50 for Sugar and around $40 for honey. Kits you can get in the store vary as well, I think when I bought the sugar wax it was around $20. I've also bought nair (the cream wax) for probably around $7. I wouldn't recommend the cream waxes for hair removal, it doesn't take the hair out from the root at all.

Now for my experience:

I walk into the salon and the women leads me to a room, she instructs me to undress and lay on the table with the sheet covering my bottom half. After she leaves I notice there is another door in this room, covered by curtains, it's a little sketchy but whatever I'll roll with it. I remove my shoes, socks, pants and underwear and climb onto the table that's lined with paper. After a while the women comes back into the room and we begin. She removes the sheet covering me, I don't know what to do with my hands so I just lay them on my stomach. This is the first time anyone other then my doctor has looked at my vagina, surprisingly I'm pretty cool about it but my hands are super sweaty. She looks down and the first thing out of her mouth is "Oh my goodness!" immediately I'm thinking what?! what?! Do I have an abnormal vagina? I mean I know it can't very well be pretty, it's covered in hair but do I fall under the ugly vag category?! I try to laugh it off and cooly say "oh... what's wrong?" she puts her face eerily close to my hoo ha and says "you have a lot of in grown hair!" I let out a sigh "ya, that's why I'm doing this, so I can put a stop to that" Then she goes on to talk about it a bit more, at this point I'm a little self conscious but hey, that's why I traveled an hour and a half to get this done instead of doing it in my home town ;) . She starts the waxing and oh. my. goodness. it hurt. Not like super a lot but enough to make me wince. She asked me to pull the skin tight with my hands and of course since they are still sweaty they are slipping and sliding everywhere so I keep having to readjust. Eventually she gets to the center and I guess I let out a breath when she pulled the hair out cuz she stopped, put her hands over my hands and told me not to cry. I laughed and said I wouldn't cry, then I asked if some girls do. She told me that a lot do actually. I was surprised at that, I mean ya it hurt but it wasn't anything I couldn't withstand. I do think I have a high pain tolerance though. Well maybe not super high but higher then some girls I guess. Well I must since I didn't even cry :p .Then she gets me to flip over to my back side. Like in between the cheeks ya know. I would highly recommend doing this. Who wants hair there anyway?! Gross! Then she makes you spread them with your hands... it's a little weird, I feel like that's how I would feel getting anal cavity searched in a prison...but she didn't.. you know.. go in. Alright! Moving on lol.

 After she was finished she told me to check it out. I awkwardly half sit up, look down, sure it looks like a hairless vagina but I feel I need to do more because she's looking at me expectantly. So I take my hands squish my thigh to the side, and again to the other side, I look at her "yep! looks good" She seems content with that and puts the blanket back over me and leaves the room. I wasn't sure if I'd be walking funny after that (I don't know why I thought I would) but nope, I was walking normally and pain free. It was a little sensitive if I would press on it but otherwise all was good. I tipped her $10 too, not sure if that isn't a lot but it's better then nothing and if I'm gonna tip my hair dresser for touching my hair I'm sure gonna tip by vagina technician for touching my nether regions (also just for information sake, don't worry about getting turned on at all... not sure if that would be a concern of yours or not... she spritzes you down with sanitizer then wipes you down like shes changing a babies diaper... then to add to that she douses it in baby powder to dry it all off, it's all very professional and the least bit sexy).

The second time I went in I got a honey wax, it was nice to compare the two, I also got my underarms done at that time. I will say this, make sure your hair has grown for at least 2 weeks because my hair wasn't long enough and not a lot came out with the waxing. She ended up having to go in with the tweezers and pretty much tweezed all of my underarms. They were pretty numb after a while so I didn't feel much.

I think that's about all I have to say about vaginas and armpits and wax. Hope you enjoyed the read and maybe I've convinced you to get your vajayjay done too ;)

Tuesday, 4 November 2014

Where Are You Going

I'm sitting on the couch, I look over at the t.v., walkers are coming. Look down at my phone, no texts and I already caught up on all of my social media. Slide my eyes upward slightly, look at my brother through my hair so he wont notice me. He doesn't notice me. Back at my phone, back at the t.v. Grab the blanket next to me, cover my torso with it, I'm not cold though. Shift my left foot onto my right foot where they lay across the ottoman. Check my phone. Nothing. Brother is grossed out by what is on the television screen, I smile. Brother gets up, he doesn't want to be grossed out. I tell him they wont show it all, he relaxes as he tops up his drink. He sits down as the screen gets gorier, lets out a grossed out noise and looks at me, I laugh. Oops. Eyes back on the t.v., then my phone, I sigh, text my friend. Put my phone down. Phone lights up, friend says come over. I ask brother if he will be okay to keep watching alone, he scoffs at me and says yes. He's tough.

I climb into my vehicle, turn my heated seat on, grab my phone. What do I want to listen to? What mood am I in? Scroll to the bottom of my list, I choose something softer.I get to my friends house and we watch a show. We laugh, we joke, the time spent is good. The show is over, I get restless, I tell her I should go home to sleep. I intend to. I climb back into my vehicle, turn my heated seat on, grab my phone. I choose something vocally straining and I sing along. I want my throat to scratch and hurt, I want to be raspy.

I'm driving along the streets, not thinking, just moving on instinct. Turn right, stop. Turn left, stop. Accelerate, stop. Turn my head to the right and look toward a dark street. I want that one, turn right. Nobody is behind me, I creep down the street slowly as I think about how this is unlike me. I like speed, I like to be fast, I like to get where I'm going. But where am I going? Why am I here? Why am I going so slow? The dark street takes me to a longer darker street, I continue at my slow pace. Stop sign. I look left toward a dark field and it hits me. I let it wash over and consume me, just keep driving, just do it. Don't stop and don't look back, you can be free. Des please just do it. Please.

I could do it this time you know. I have the funds and the resources, I could do it. But what about your responsibilities? Can't I be reckless? Just this one time? But what would people say? I don't care anymore, they can think what they want. What about your job? Yes, my job... but I could do it you know. I could. I think about speeding down the highway toward the border, getting there as fast as I can so I can shed everything that is normal to me. I don't like my normal right now, I want a different normal. I want fresh. I want freedom. Freedom from myself mostly. I picture ripping through my own skin and stepping out a new person. Maybe distance will allow myself to do that. Maybe. Or it could all stay the same. Maybe its time away that I crave, just for clarity. Maybe my situation doesn't need to change but my frame of mind does.

Now I picture speeding down the highway in the opposite direction, toward the airport. I could hop on a plane and go anywhere, my first thought is Alabama. Why Alabama? Who knows. I picture a smile on my face and a weight being lifted. I want it. I can feel it. I can taste it. But I can't have it. Because this is real life, and in real life you can't just take off. Not me anyway.

(This is actually a photo from Alabama)

Tuesday, 17 June 2014

Budget Friendly

This might be kind of boring for some but I feel like it's really important to know. I'm the type of person that loves to make lists, I could make a list about anything! When I know I'm going to go clothes shopping I'll make a list in my phone of all the things I want to get (weather I stick to the list or not), going camping I'll make a list of food and what to pack, going on a trip I'll make a list of every piece of clothing I want to take, planning a party I have tons of lists. My 'notes' in my phone is full of lists :) I also really like to budget, like budget my finances, it's an easy way to keep track of how much money is coming in and whats going out and when. That way I never find myself in a jam or strapped for cash. Well of course even if you have a budget it doesn't always mean you stick to it so there are times when money is tighter from not sticking to the budget, however I always know when that is going to happen so I can be mentally prepared.

What I like to do is keep a running spreadsheet of each paycheque, so I will have my budget planned out for a few months in advance. I do all of my banking on my phone so come pay day I take out my budget (which I keep as a paper copy in my purse) see what payments I need to manually do and I do those immediately through my online banking. That way those payments are done with and I don't accidentally spend the money that was allocated for that bill. Then I cross off those items from my budget plan so I can visually see what is left to pay. I take a look at what scheduled payments are supposed to come out of the account so I know what to expect for the next 2 weeks.

This is what my budgets look like with both mine and Mark's income and expenses combined:
*numbers do not reflect actual income and expenses, I used dummy numbers for visual.

                                 June 13/14

Cheque Total: $2000

Expenses                               Other

100 Fuel                                100 Mastercard
200 Groceries                        100 Credit Line
100   Smokes
160 Spending
100 Insurance (car)
100 Phones
100   Hydro
$860 Total
+$200 Other
1060 Total Expenses
-2000 Income
$940 Extra Money

                                June 27/14
Cheque Total: $2000

Expenses                             Other

100 Fuel                              100 Visa
200 Groceries                      100 Credit Line
100   Smokes
160 Spending
100   Insurance (escape)
600 Rent
$1260 Total
+$200 Other
1460 Total Expenses
-2000 Income
$540 Extra Money

This is exactly how my budgets are set up. All of my normal expenses are on the left hand side, and yes I budget for smokes. Mark is a smoker and that wont change so I know that money will always get taken out of the account so I may as well budget for it. The 'spending money' is more of a guideline. I'd like to stay within the dollar amount I allocate for it but if we go over that gets taken out of 'extra money'. The 'other' expenses I keep for credit cards and credit line as well as any other things I know I will need to pay for (such as gifts, clothes shopping, new tires, ect.). I keep these in the 'other' column because I  know they wont be permanent bi-weekly expenses. The 'extra money' that is left over is supposed to be for saving, or for putting onto credit cards if we need to make more then a $100 payment. One good idea is to put that money into a savings account right away so you can't even touch it, that way your $160 spending money is all you've got and it may keep you from going over that. But if you aren't good at that then you might end up going into the minus in your account and that will affect your next weeks budget.

Right now we are renting but if we owned a house I would also have sections for fire insurance, property tax and that sort of thing to go into a separate account monthly so that at the end of the year we aren't scrambling for money.

I hope this helped anyone thinking about doing a budget or realizing they need a budget more then they thought they did. Just because I have a budget doesn't mean I always stick to it though (something I need to work on). It does help you to see just exactly how much money you could be putting away though and that might help guilt you into not spending so much ;)

Monday, 16 June 2014

Fast & Easy Curls

Wow, I need to get on top of this already. I've had internet at home for over a month and my blog and YouTube are not getting any better. So much for my resolutions :s BUT that can all change, I just need to be dedicated. As for my YouTube I posted a video yesterday and I have 3 more videos recorded I just need to edit them and upload so there's that to look forward to! As for my blog... I thought I would have more to blog about on a daily basis but I seem to be at a loss most days. I do think about my blog often, I just don't know what to write about most of the time. Maybe if I just get into the groove of things then things will come more naturally. Here's to hoping! Anyway, THIS post is about the video I posted on  My YouTube Channel yesterday.

I've been styling my hair this way for about a week now and I'm in loooooove with it! It's super easy and quite fast when you get the hang out it. It takes me about 20 mins start to finish but if you are working with already dried hair it would go faster. I styled my hair this way today too but of course my bangs didn't want to cooperate so I'm not really feelin it :( You know how you can go all day at work and absolutely hate your hair and then you go home and look in the mirror and you're like "hey, this actually looks pretty good" and then you get all your confidence back again. But you didn't even change anything, so you went all day feeling like you look like crap but in the evening you feel like your hair is as bomb as Iggy Azalea ?!? I'll probably feel like that today.

Products used to achieve awesomeness:

Osis Blow and Go Thick heat protectant
Healthy Sexy Hair Soy Touchable hairspray
Arbonne texturizing mousse

If you live in the Winkler area a good tip for you is to go to Masters of Design in the Southland mall and get your hair products from there, they are usually always on sale!

(sorry for the quality of this pic)

Tools Used:

1" curling wand
Blow dryer with diffuser.
(pretty self explanatory, didn't think you'd need photos of these)